So I participated in a #ClearTheAir chat on Twitter for the first time last week. One of the questions asked about ghosts we carry with us as parents or educators. I've been thinking a lot on and off this summer about beliefs or expectations I held to be true growing up and where those came from and why. So that's where my brain went when @ClearTheAir (@ValBrown) posed that question. You can see my original response below. Part of my answer dealt with my hometown where people tended to not question how things were done while I was growing up there. Another part focused on raising my kids and trying to balance teaching my kids to be polite and respectful but also teaching them to speak their minds and disrupt. I quickly realized that I should reexamine what I grew up believing was polite and respectful and that there were likely inequities and glaring issues there. Barb and Jimmy pushed me to be accountable, which is great, because even though I'm trying to be more transparent in my growth and journey with equity, honestly, I probably would've unpacked it quietly on my own. But because they inquired, I decided, okay, let's do this. I'll mull it over, and share out my thinking. So here we go.
Whether it was intentional or unintentional, from my adults at home or from society or from how I read people's reactions in my hometown, etc. I grew up thinking that polite/respectful meant:
So, I'll start drafting an alternative list. Being polite/respectful means:
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